# How to get my new cockatiel to bond with me?



## cockatielteddy8

Hello...
I got a 7 month old cockatiel almost a week ago. He was hand fed and has his wings clipped (for his safety). Since he was hand fed I know I should hold him and let him get used to me. I knew the first few days he would be nervous and scared... But he still constantly bites me... he is molting and that might be half of the problem. But he hisses and bites when i try to get him out of his cage and then tries to fly back in. I am willing to try anything to get him used to me and to stop biting and being aggressive. Also when I do get him out he likes to go onto my shoulder but then he doesn't want to get off so he bites. Once he has bitten so hard he broke skin. Is there any way to stop this behavior? I would really like to bond with my bird... and i would like him to whistle and talk. Also he isn't vocalizing at all... He has only peeped a few times and one whistle. Is there hope for my cockatiel that he will warm up to me?


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## Vinny

You can try to get him to vocalize by playing YouTube clips of other cockateils singing, whistling etc. How long have you had him in your home? He's prob still getting used to you...


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## minischn

I've only had my cockatiel a week now and I know what your going through, except Bird is not tame (he doesn't hate people, but he's not really handable). He's come a long way in a week. For the first two days, I pretty much left him alone in his cage, just kind of talked to him and offered millet from my hands (he's very hand shy). After another day or two he would eat from my hands, when they were outside the cage, but was still terrified when I put them in it. He has yet to bite me because from day one, whenever he hisses, I know I've gone too far and made him uncomfortable. I try not to let it get that far, but it happens. I still felt bad because he didn't seem to like me. Now he can't stop begging for my attention. 

What changed was all by accident. He missed his buddies and flying around (he wasn't clipped) and I felt horrible for taking him from that life. I know now that I have made progress with him, and where I may fail, I do give him more in some other areas so I suppose it balances out. 

I was stupid. I closed the door, turned off the fan, closed the blinds and opened the cage door. I sat on my bed and watched him watch with curiosity. I didn't think he would fly out and beeline around my room. I figured he'd just crawl on the cage, before being that brave. I was wrong. He flew around and after just a few minutes of coaxing him that it was alright, I knew I had made a mistake. I was goign to ruin everything, unless he would land on his cage and get back in. He didn't. And he is petrified of hands, even now, but then he wouldn't let me do anything. Everytime I get close he woudl start flying in circles and land someplace else. I figured my best bet was to make his cage the best place to land by placing things he wasn't fond of on all the other perches in the room. What surpised me was the blanket I use to cover him was his favorite place to land. I thought he hated it, but he was perfectly fine landing on it. So, I folded it a bit and, while holding it in my hand, offered him it to step up on. He did. At first I didn't move, just let him stand on it and let him know I wasn't going to push him past where he was. I was fine with taking the extra time. I didn't want to have to grab him and ruin everythign. In ten minutes after that discovery he was willing to let me walk him across the 'very scary' room and over to his cage door. After that he started eatign from me, and started calling to me when I left the room. I also had a few breakdown moments there, because I hated myself for doing it to him, and I think he understood I was trying.

I suppose what I mean in all of this is to take it REALLY SLOW. I mean, at first he would only stay on the blanket for a few seconds before hopping off. As soon as you push your bird past his/her comfort zone they hate it. Of course, your bird is already tame, and is probably just getting used to you. I would start by just feeding him treats that he only gets from you, and if he lets you pet him, be careful about it. Always watch his feathers, and work on reading his body language. He'll give you some sign before biting you. I also wouldn't let him up on your shoulder until he's mroe comfortable with your hands. Some birds just get aggressive up there. I suppose the biggest thing to remember is to offer your bird a choice. Offer your hand as a perch, if he steps up, reward him. If he doesn't, leave him be. Birds aren't the type to enjoy being manipulated. If we do that they won't like us anymore than we would like them.

As for vocalizing it mgiht just need time. Bird wouldn't say anything for the first few days. But the youtube videos are a good idea. I tried that, but Bird went from a five bird household to a single bird household, and spent the next half hour calling for his friends. Another breakdown for me. But for you it will probably work. it will be the best way to teach him whistles and how to talk. Also, as someone on here told me, talk/sing to him quietly. That's what I did. 

Oh and stopping biting. Whatever you do, when he bites you DON'T GIVE HIM WHAT HE WANTS (whether thats you leaving him where he is, or get your hand away). It'll only teach him that biting gets him what he wants. That's why Bird hisses at me so much, because I've shown him that it's an appropriate way to get me to leave him alone. I'd really watch your bird and see which feathers are 'angry' feathers and which ones are 'nervous' ones. It's always better to not push the nervousness too far. Once you get to know him better, and he gets to know you better, you can start trying to see all the signals you missed. Then train one of those signals to be the 'leave me alone' thing. 

Sorry for the block of writing, I hope I remembered to separate it a bit more


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## cockatielteddy8

Thanks so much for the help!!! I will take it slower with him... let him get used to my hands and let him find out they aren't so scary. He is on a seed diet. I would like to convert him to pellet because I know it is healthier for him. What are good ways to do that? Also he doesn't like fruits or veggies... is there any ways to get him to eat those too?


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## minischn

I'm lucky Bird is already on one, but one site I go to all the time (their like my birdie mentors) has done lots of posts on this. Here's one. http://www.birdtricks.com/blog/?s=seeds+to+pellets&x=0&y=0 well I just searched their blog. the third one down looks helpful. Also, start eating meals in the same room as him. their flock creatures. If you have something they want, they'll be curious and explore. I'm working on the fruits and veggies with Bird too, who apparently has a healthy appetite and loves to eat your food, but he's not quite there yet with me.


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## cockatielteddy8

Thanks! I didn't know you could eat with them. Can they eat a little of what you are having? I know avocado and chocolate they can't eat though. Is that a good way to get them to want out of their cage also?


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## Melgann

Lol if I don't share my food with bailey his cranky feather come out! And heaven help me if I don't share noodles  I share almost everything except any kind of chocolate avocado, onion ( I read somewhere they can't eat onion) if your not sure check the toxic food list I don't know how to post the link but the cockatiel cottage website is really helpful.


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## cockatielteddy8

Hahahaha! Bailey sounds really cute! I can't wait for my cockatiel to trust me enough to want to eat with me and hang out with me!


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## minischn

Like previously mentioned they can eat many of our foods, but I would definately check out a FEW safe foods lists. But remember that our saliva is REALLY poisonous to many animals, so make sure he never eats the same piece of food you do, just in case.


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## cockatielteddy8

Yes... I found out to never let them eat after you. I will look at a few safe food lists. Thanks! Sorry for all the questions... but I have one more! If my cockatiel is molting will it make him extra crabby?


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## dudeitsapril

offer him his favorite treats, take his favorite toy and play with him with it. talk to him. Just spend time with him, even if he's in his cage and he will start to realize that you are nice and take care of him.


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## minischn

Molting is just uncomfortable, so he may be more crabby about you touching him, but I don't think it'll affect his overall mood. Well... I'm honestly not the most trustworthy in this regard, as Bird is my first bird and I've only had him for a week now so I haven't dealt with a molt.


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## cockatielteddy8

Yeah... I know molting is pretty uncomfortable for them. This is Teddy's first molt. Thank you for your help!


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