# Making no progress with taming



## Lupite (Jul 29, 2014)

Hi all,

So I got my cockatiel, Webber, a month ago. I bought him from a pet shop in the area because I just fell in love with him when I saw him. I was under the impression he'd been hand-tamed from one of the younger store attendants there but I think he was mistaken. 

Anyway, they couldn't tell me his age either but he's definitely not a baby. I'd post pictures but I'm at work ... anyway, at first, he used to flap madly to get away from my hand anytime I had to reach into the cage. After a week I started letting him out and now every night when I get home I open the door and it's 50/50 as to whether he'll actually seize the chance for the five hours his door is open and fly around. I've made him two perches in my bedroom that he love sitting on. 

I just feel like we made a small step in the right direction to becoming hand tame but it's just stopped. He now stares at my hand whenever I do anything in the cage. When I try to get him to step up, he turns his head sideways (presumably to keep an eye on me) and will slowly open his beak the closer I get to him. Sometimes I bump his claw by accident and he'll flinch. If I get too close (like, closer than a finger-width away from him) he'll lunge for me with his beak. He sometimes makes faint hissing noises.

He didn't start hissing or biting for the first two weeks, but now he does it fairly often. He will stay on perches when I move them (it's how I get him back in his cage after he flies around) but that's it. He loves millet and seed bells, but he won't eat them out of my hand.

Any tips? I know it could take months before he trusts me enough to actually step up, but I just feel like the things I'm doing (what I thought was right) aren't doing anything. I adopted him knowing that he was probably an aviary-raised cockatiel and I couldn't be certain about anything, and he is worth the effort but it just feels a bit frustrating sometimes.


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## slugabed (Jul 27, 2014)

Have you just spent time with him in general without making him get out of his cage? I've learnt that reaching your hand into the cage as a start is a bad idea. What I did was to spend time with the bird in its cage, just talking to it and avoid staring. Since mine was a baby from a breeder it only took a day for it to warm up to me (and now it's totally attached to me). Might take a bit longer with yours.

As an aside, I'm more of a cat person, and so far even with the most skittish of cats I've been able to interact with most cats I've met given enough time with the same techniques. Animals in general need to know you're not a threat, and that you aren't a predator. Never stare at them!

Anyway, good luck with your cockatiel!


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## dianne (Nov 27, 2013)

Webber sounds a lot like my Emma, who has been with me for nine months.

She behaved just like Webber for the first few months. She also came from a pet store.

I started by removing all the sunflower seeds from her seed mix, and gave them to her by hand, between the bars of her cage. At first I may have had to drop them into her cup (I don't quite remember).

Then, I was able to give her sunflower seeds while she was on top of her cage. She would take the seed and immediately run away.

Now, she will fly about six inches or a foot to my arm to get her seed. Sometimes she will stay while she eats it. Sometimes she flies right back. She has NEVER had sat on my hand or my finger.

I think there will be more progress with her, but it is very slow. She is a shy little girl. She does show interest when I talk to her. If she is on top of the cage, she has recently started coming over to where my head is when I talk to her. However, if I try to touch her, she's out of there!


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## mareeder (Jul 31, 2013)

I'd try spending as much free time as possible sitting next to the cage without reaching into it. My cockatiel, Pip, took a long time to adjust to his new arrangements, and you want to give them time to understand that their new cage is a safe place, and that you aren't a hulking monster out to wring his little neck.

Try reading a book while listening to soft music while sitting next to his cage. Like Dianne said, feed him treats through the bars of the cage, so he begins to associate your hand with the treats.

Pip LOVES it when I sit by his cage and sing and play my ukulele. :blush:


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## dianne (Nov 27, 2013)

Hi, Mareeder!
I play mountain dulcimer, and my birds are big fans.


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## mareeder (Jul 31, 2013)

Love it!

Pip really seems to dig it when I play.


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## sunnysmom (Sep 23, 2011)

These posts have some good suggestions:

Food Bribery - http://talkcockatiels.com/showthread.php?t=28661

Taming lperry82 version - http://talkcockatiels.com/showthread.php?t=22073

__________________


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## Lupite (Jul 29, 2014)

slugabed said:


> Have you just spent time with him in general without making him get out of his cage? I've learnt that reaching your hand into the cage as a start is a bad idea. What I did was to spend time with the bird in its cage, just talking to it and avoid staring. Since mine was a baby from a breeder it only took a day for it to warm up to me (and now it's totally attached to me). Might take a bit longer with yours.
> 
> As an aside, I'm more of a cat person, and so far even with the most skittish of cats I've been able to interact with most cats I've met given enough time with the same techniques. Animals in general need to know you're not a threat, and that you aren't a predator. Never stare at them!
> 
> Anyway, good luck with your cockatiel!


I've spent time with him next to his cage but I never really thought about me reaching in as being an invasion of his territory - I'll definitely stop doing that. I'm pretty comfortable around dogs and cats and I know the ways to show them that you're not actually going to kill them, but Webber is my first bird so I guess it's just a bit of a learning curve! Thanks for the advice.


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## Lupite (Jul 29, 2014)

dianne said:


> Webber sounds a lot like my Emma, who has been with me for nine months.
> 
> She behaved just like Webber for the first few months. She also came from a pet store.
> 
> ...


It's funny, Webber doesn't seem to touch his sunflower seeds at all. He does love his millet though; maybe I need to take it out of his cage and use it as a bribe. I knew when I got him that it would be slow progress but it's just a bit disheartening when you see the same behaviour over and over! Although, I guess that is probably due to what I'm doing - I can't keep doing the same things and expecting a different result. 

It's good that Emma's made progress though! Gives me hope for Webber .


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## eduardo (Jan 27, 2012)

I know you feel frustrated, but the progress that you make with Webber also depends on the amount of time you two spend together. You mentioned that you let him out in the evening when you get home. Does he spend the entire day alone?


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## slugabed (Jul 27, 2014)

Lupite said:


> I've spent time with him next to his cage but I never really thought about me reaching in as being an invasion of his territory - I'll definitely stop doing that. I'm pretty comfortable around dogs and cats and I know the ways to show them that you're not actually going to kill them, but Webber is my first bird so I guess it's just a bit of a learning curve! Thanks for the advice.


Yea, it is a bit of a learning curve! One of the big differences I've learnt is that dogs and cats are still predators; cockatiels are not. They will have a much larger fear factor to overcome than our usual pets.


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## cpc1007 (Jul 22, 2014)

Just curious, in this situation, would experienced owners suggest to get Webber clipped to increase the dependency?


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## Lupite (Jul 29, 2014)

cpc1007 said:


> Just curious, in this situation, would experienced owners suggest to get Webber clipped to increase the dependency?


I've thought about this; I don't know how I feel about clipping because he loves perching up in the corner of my room on a rope that I set up for him, but if it will help the process I would definitely be okay with doing it for the period that it takes him to become tame.


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## Lupite (Jul 29, 2014)

eduardo said:


> I know you feel frustrated, but the progress that you make with Webber also depends on the amount of time you two spend together. You mentioned that you let him out in the evening when you get home. Does he spend the entire day alone?


My brother's girlfriend works from home and goes in and seems him through the day, and my mother's partner loves Webber and once he gets home at 3PM he lets him out. I do sometimes feel like getting another cockatiel - perhaps a hand-reared one - would be a good idea because I do feel bad for the times that he is by himself.


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## dianne (Nov 27, 2013)

When Emma wasn't tame after 3 months, I was kind of disappointed. I felt I really wanted a bird that was tame. 

So, I got a second. I got him from a small bird store. He was hand-fed, and I had to give him some hand
feedings after I got him. I picked the calmest tiel in the group. He is wonderful!

I am very glad I got the second bird (Silver). I still feel Emma will get more tame in time. But, it's been eight months now. I would still be waiting. I still love her. But, Silver fulfills my other need.


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## ScarredEclipse (Apr 1, 2014)

Dianne, I'm so proud of all the progress that you've made with Emma. It sounds like she's come a long way and that you're on her terms with her, and it's easier for her to bond to you that way. That and the fact that you've never given up and give her unconditional love.

My Freckles, who passed on the 3rd, was done who was a completely different bird when she was clipped. She instantly became tame and pretty mellow, and was open to me doing "step up" and eventually stroking her. But that doesn't work for every bird. For example - I clipped Tweety right away (he bit to draw blood), but that didn't tame him any, he still bit hard enough to draw blood. It took me well over a year, I believe, to fully earn his trust.


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## Elishiva (Aug 23, 2013)

I had the same problems with Luna and Sunny. Rescues that were fed by parents and never handled by humans until they were rescued. The owner just threw in food and water and called it good. 

At first they wanted nothing to do with me. I'd spend hours trying to coax them into stepping up on my finger. They escaped a few times from the cage and ended up needing me to help them back up but then they would bolt into the cage. I almost gave up till someone told me to sit next to them and read a book. Looking at them and placing a small spray of millet that they soon associated the reading with my voice and the treat of millet. After a while would read with my hand on the cage. Then with my hand resting on the lip of the opening with the cage unlocked. Then I started holding the millets spray in my hand and they would both come eat. I'd tell them they were good boy or girl and not look them in the eyes (predators do that and they see that as a sign you want to eat them). Soon I started picking off small clusters and the female would take the millet cluster from the tips of my finger and after a while, so would Sunny. I did this and would sing the same song when I covered up their cage at night. I'd repeat the same thing every night and in the morning I'd come in and say, "Good morning Sunny! Good morning Luna!" Just as cheerful and happy as I could be. I'd clean out their dishes and their cages and feed them. Spend a few minutes while they ate and would read or sing to them. I moved them to a bigger cage and brought in more birds. 2 of them were to breed Lulu and Squirt and the other one was a 2 month old rescue I was given who latched onto me like its momma. His name is Spirit. 
With each bird I gain a confidence necessary to handle them. Part of their apprehension is possibly your insecurity. Unsureness alerts them to something they might need to be aware of and they sense it and react in a defensive manner. I suggest, like others, just spend time NOT handling them or trying to. Let them get use to who you are. Never yell around them. They don't like it and it is unsettling for them. Always speak calmly and sweetly. Whistle or sing or repeat something you would like them to say one day if they talk. Don't move too fast till they are fully comfortable with you and your home and all the other factors associated with it. But never give up or get frustrated. I spent an hour and a half trying to get Sunny down one time. He kept flying from window treatment to window treatment. Fortunately he got tired and landed on the floor. I walked over to him and sat close by and waited till he walked closer and closer till he walked up to me where I put my finger down and said, "Step up" and he did. It is at that moment you realize, it was ALLLLL worth it.


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## caterpillar (Oct 14, 2013)

Lupite said:


> My brother's girlfriend works from home and goes in and seems him through the day, and my mother's partner loves Webber and once he gets home at 3PM he lets him out. I do sometimes feel like getting another cockatiel - perhaps a hand-reared one - would be a good idea because I do feel bad for the times that he is by himself.


Be careful about getting a bird to be a companion to another bird. That said, those situations normally go awry when the first bird is hand-tamed and gets lonely when the humans are gone......introducing a second bird can change the bond that you have with the first bird. It sounds like since you have an untame bird, a second bird may actually help. Still, be careful, as you cannot be assured that they will get along.


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