# 3 years of separation anxiety screaming, please help if at all possible



## Dreamrunner (Aug 14, 2015)

3 years Ive had Cirrus, one of my female tiels, 3 years Ive been trying to cope with her severe separation anxiety/extreme bond to me...

I love her, but other stress in my life paired with her screaming is having an extremely negative effect on my mental health... I work from home so there's no escape time other than going out for groceries or entertainment purposes.

The issue being as many have probably experienced, excessive screaming/flock calling any time I'm out of sight. All day (unless i have her out of course), every day.

Now, over the 3 years, here are the things I have tried;

Brought home a second tiel so she wouldnt be lonely. I'd say she considers the other tiel as part of her flock as they will call back to eachother when separated, but it's never been enough.
Placed their cage in a dedicated room for them so things could be calm and quiet for them and to create some separation. Even when I had their cage in the computer room with me, 2 feet out of arms reach, Cirrus would cling to the corner screaming at me because she wasnt happy until she was on my shoulder.
Ive tried the usual; ignore when screaming, reward when quiet thing over these years, and also whistling or talking when out of sight. (this just makes her scream even louder when she hears im near by, like "what!? youre actually there and im not with you!? how dare you!")
Tried having a radio, music, and even a tv going in their room, does nothing.
They get 14 hours of sleep each night, put them to bed and wake them up the same time every day. Used to be only 12, but I upped it to 14 recently this year when even with 12 for a while she would start going into mating position and start cooing at me every time I entered the room. It took over a month for her to stop doing this. I'm suprised she's never layed any eggs.
They have all variety of toys, and she does play with them some, but gets bored with them quickly. There are no mirrors or bed-cozy type toys that would encourage hormones. Ive even tried completely removing all toys incase some of them were before.


What am I doing wrong? Is there anything left I can try? Is this just how it'll always be?
If it is indeed hopeless, I fear I may need to re-home them. I'm dealing with a lot of health problems and other stress in my life and I just break down some days. But if I do I'm not sure how to re-home her.. I don't just want to list her on craigslist or drop her off at a county shelter, I want to know that she'll find a good home, but I can't seem to find any aviary shelters in the area and I don't know anyone..


----------



## albinosilver (Aug 26, 2017)

I'm in the same situation as you and I've tried many of the same things you have. Some birds are just more vocal/needy than others and it's not always possible to change.

Would it be possible for you to do your work at the library or a coffee shop? I find that when my bird realizes I'm most definitely gone and out of range he quiets down. I walked out the apartment door and listened. He called for maybe 5-10 minutes and then stopped. Now he stops calling the moment the door closes. 

If you do this for a few months, your bird will get more used to being quiet during the day. You could then try doing your work at home but in a different room. She might then continue behaving as if you weren't home. White noise like a fan is helpful so she can't hear you either.


----------



## Dreamrunner (Aug 14, 2015)

albinosilver said:


> I'm in the same situation as you and I've tried many of the same things you have. Some birds are just more vocal/needy than others and it's not always possible to change.
> 
> Would it be possible for you to do your work at the library or a coffee shop? I find that when my bird realizes I'm most definitely gone and out of range he quiets down. I walked out the apartment door and listened. He called for maybe 5-10 minutes and then stopped. Now he stops calling the moment the door closes.
> 
> If you do this for a few months, your bird will get more used to being quiet during the day. You could then try doing your work at home but in a different room. She might then continue behaving as if you weren't home. White noise like a fan is helpful so she can't hear you either.


Unfortunately my work must be done at home on a very non-portable PC. 
Trying out the fan for the white noise idea now. So far so good? But Ive said that before when other things seem to help until she "adapts".

It's probably just how she is, quite needy. If nothing works and re-homing doesnt seem realistic, I might just finally bend and have her out as often as I can as if I had a second head on my shoulder... but she'll just have to deal when I'm doing stuff like cooking for her own good.

The troublemaker in question; https://feathersandscales.tumblr.co...ybridlizard-bird-does-my-shoulder-look-like-a


----------

