# So chess thinks the mirror is a real bird.



## Rorschach (Nov 2, 2010)

I can't stand this anymore. I'm just going to sell him and the cage and save up some money for a conure, or maybe a meyer's parrot. I think I'm done with tiels these two idiots have put a bad taste in my mouth.

At this point if he isn't in front of the mirror he flock calls CONSTANTLY I either have to keep him covered so he goes to sleep, or let him sit in front of the mirror all day.


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## lperry82 (Aug 2, 2010)

I think you should get another tiel to keep him company and he should stop this behaviour my two are alright never give up hope  no matter how hard you try


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## roxy culver (May 27, 2010)

You've got to remove the mirror if its that bad...its a boy thing, he thinks the mirror is his mate. After a couple days he'll stop calling for it and hopefully settle down.


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## elenafan23 (Aug 16, 2009)

If you can't stand the sound of a cockatiel why would you want a conure? removing the mirror should work.


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## Cheryl (Dec 27, 2008)

I have to agree with elenafan23, if you can't take a cockatiel, you're crazy for wanting a loud conure lol.

Just keep the mirror away for a while and he should eventually get over it OR get another bird.
You can also try distracting him with treats.


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## tielfan (Aug 31, 2008)

> these two idiots have put a bad taste in my mouth.


That's pretty harsh. So contrary to what everyone else says, I think it's probably best to rehome him IF you can find a home with experienced bird owners who won't get upset if he's noisy or doesn't want to play with them. No offense, but it sounds like you don't have the patience to deal with "problem" birds. It's not easy and some people just aren't cut out for it. I'm sorry that this hasn't worked out for you.

You might be better off forgetting about the conure too and going for a fairly quiet mammal as a pet. Conures are louder than cockatiels and can bite harder because they have bigger beaks, and they can certainly have behavior problems too. 

If you really want a bird then a non-parrot species might be better for you. There are species that make good pets that aren't capable of biting hard and can't make a lot of noise. Ask srtiels about mousebirds, they're supposed to be wonderful pets.


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## Belinda (Oct 9, 2010)

I was looking at getting a green cheek conure instead of a cockatiel but they seemed like a lot more a handful than cockatiels, they require much more attention (and Arnie demands SO much attention already that's hard to believe!) and like others have said they can be louder too and generally more destructive than cockatiels because they have larger beaks (and more energy to use it with). 

But, maybe you're more on a conure person. I would definitely look into it but don't rush and look around/read a bit - maybe go to the other parrot forum and ask about them there?


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## Renae (Feb 9, 2008)

The fact that you are calling them "idiots" tells me you shouldn't own birds, full stop. 

Not every bird is going to be quiet enough to suit your liking, this is something people like you need to realize. And don't expect a Conure to be quiet 24/7, because trust me, they aren't, I have 2 Green Cheek Conures and they can get *REALLY* loud.


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## Rorschach (Nov 2, 2010)

You people know full well it isn't about the noise. It's about the fact that I adopted two birds who were not tamed, and were in fact mistreated (albeit with the best of intentions) by their two previous owners.

They were cage bound, anti social, biters, and all I wanted was a nice caring pet. I've spent the better part of 2 months attempting to remedy these issues with no success, everything I've tried has failed and he is just as badly behaved as when I got him.

The noise doesn't bother me, the fact that despite hours of loving care and coaxing every day for weeks has yielded no return is what has me frustrated. I've been a very good home for this bird and have gone out of my way to try and bring it out of it's shell and it hasn't worked, someone with more experience than I may have better luck but the problem really stems from the fact that I should not have gotten a 'rescue' bird as my first bird. It's like opening a day care and the very first kid you get belongs in juvie. It's not the bird's fault, it's not my fault, I'm just not experienced enough to handle the kind of care this bird needs, and the bird is not equipped to give me what I'm looking for in a pet.

And for the record the plan is this.

Tomorrow I'm going to go out and get a friend for Chess, he needs another bird, he is never going to bond to me, MAYBE (not counting on it) the new bird will bond to me despite the fact that I'm just getting it from a pet store (so it may not be hand/co raised) and Chess will not be setting a good example for the newcomer. Either way I'm removing myself emotionally from Chess and unnamed cockatiel #1, I'll talk to them, I'll give them treats through the bars, I'll allow them outside time either on their own or with me if they want it, I'll do everything a good owner is supposed to do for his birds in an attempt to make them happy. Except I don't care if they bond to me or not.

Then I plan to save up my money for a cage/stand/toys for a meyer's parrot (I didn't check but I'm pretty sure I said a 'conure or something', as I didn't know what kind I wanted initially) which is what I decided I want after some research (I like that it's friendly, good natured, and good for people who live in apartment, also playful). And then when I finally have enough money I'll rehome Chess + cockatiel #1 to a good home, get a little extra money by selling them the cage/food/toys/playstand as a package deal, and go buy my new bird.

It's not an ideal situation and who knows how it will work out in practice, but thats the plan.

And to the people who left negative comments about my personality I would just like to remind you that my posts on this forum are me in my most negative stressed out state. If you only knew a person when they were at their worst it would not paint a pleasant picture, and I can understand that, but please understand how I conduct myself away from this forum when I'm not stressed about something, is much different and more reasonable.


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## roxy culver (May 27, 2010)

I agree with you, as a first bird, being inexperienced, getting an untame bird is not ideal. Nothing wrong with it being a rescue, some rescues are more tame than pet store birds. The thing is, you got one that has a lot of issues and as a first time bird, that can be difficult. I got lucky with my first birds, they're cuddly little buggers. You never know, this new one might be just what you're looking for and may set a good example for Chess. Don't give up yet, there is always room for improvement.


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## tielfan (Aug 31, 2008)

I encourage you to take some time and think things over before you get another bird. If these birds never bond with you or become tame, are you going to enjoy having them around? And if not, is it really a good situation for either you or the birds to have pets that you don't like but take care of because you feel obligated?

It can take a couple of months for a hand-fed baby to relax and start acting social in a new home. A bird that's been neglected or abused can take considerably longer than that, and might never come around. I don't know if anyone here meant to say anything negative about you - I certainly didn't, and I hope it didn't come across that way. But to be honest, since the beginning of this saga I've been worried because it seemed like you were really anxious for fast results and that isn't something you can count on in a situation like this. Birds with baggage are a MAJOR challenge and it takes a LOT of time and patience for them to reach whatever pet potential they have.

You're already in a negative stressed out state because of the lack of results, and if you hurry out and get another bird you might end up compounding your problems. Especially if the two birds don't get along with each other, and there's no guarantee that they will. Are you sure that you can emotionally detach yourself from the situation? Because that's sort of the opposite of what's been happening so far, and it's generally impossible to turn emotions on and off at will.

Please don't take this the wrong way, we're trying to help. I sympathize with the difficulties and want what's best for the birds, who have had a rough life and can't always be what we want them to be.


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## Belinda (Oct 9, 2010)

Would an option be getting a tame hand fed baby or adult tiel? So at least you have one bird you can interact with, and perhaps that will make Chess relax a little around you. You took on a lot and I would never have considered getting an untame bird, let alone two as my first birds so I think you've been really brave in taking on this challenge. If it doesn't work out, you did your best. The fact you've been posting in this forum shows you care a lot. And I think you're right, if you're inexperienced and had enough you should rehome him - you'll both just get more frustrated with the situation. I would suggest you not get another bird unless you're thinking of keeping them. Simply because I think it would be easier to rehome 1 problem bird than 2 problem birds, or get a hand tame one now, rehome Chess and keep the hand tame tiel (you of course, will most likely need a replacement for Chess though). Let us know how it goes


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## lperry82 (Aug 2, 2010)

Never give up hope im sure he will eventually come around
I was about to give up hope with my tweety until i got dobby and she changed into a new bird, she was cage bound, hardly eating, just sat there looking in the mirror 24/7.
Dobby was the best thing for her


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## Nika (Nov 9, 2010)

Rorschach, I do understand your annoyannce and I also understand negative comments which were provoked by your rather misfortunate choice of words. I got my cockatiel 6 weeks ago and I also have been going out of my way to make her happy and to bond with me (getting up 40 minutes earlier to cook her breakie and spend some time before I go to work, buying her loads of toys, giving her treats, singing to her, rushing back home, so she can play with me), she is a tame bird, hand raised and well- bonding went pear shaped, chose my partner who doesn't do anything for her and I ended up with a cockatiel who is just a bird towards me- I do all the cleaning after her, feeding and getting stuff she needs and I get absolutely nothing in return; sometimes she's aggressive towards me, but most of the time just indifferent, won't make a noise when I enter or leave the room and the only time she will actually fly to me is when I'm eating something she wants (she will then try to eat from my mouth, but I feed her from my hand), after she's done, she will fly away and stay there all evening. All the sweet-natured, wonderful pet which is in her gets, yes, my partner, who, despite liking her, couldn't really care less for her. And yes, it is really upsetting, especially when you read how other people get on great with their tiels, they sure have some misshaps, short periods when their tiels suddenly show no interest, but then hey, all is hunky dory. Cuddy was a great pet to me for ONE, first night she spent at our home, next day she met Chris and that was the end of her friendliness towards me. So I'm also thinking of rehoming her (and i know that I'll be called cruel for considering this, well, I myself don't feel great about myself for this) but looking after a pet who has no interest in you is not rewarding by any account.
Sorry about the essay.


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## Rorschach (Nov 2, 2010)

The new bird won't turn into a problem bird, and Chess isn't a problem bird if you don't need to have a nice cuddly friend. The primary reason I feel the need to get a new bird is the flock calling, it's not the noise itself, certainly he can be just as loud when he's singing happy songs as when he's flock calling, but it's like listening to a baby cry and not being able to solve the problem, it's not that you mind the noise it's that you want to help and can't.

You so badly just want your little guy to be a happy healthy cockatiel yet you can't fix the problem he has AND still get him to bond with you. So I'm just doing what I believe to be best for Chess and maybe if this new bird is of a good emotional state we'll see some improvement. After all, Chess never leaves his cage now, but when Peak was here and Peak left the cage, Chess would often follow him out. Maybe the new bird will be a good example for Chess in how a normal bird should act.

Oh and the other day I did some research into cockatiels, reading about their personalities, likes, dislikes, and how normal birds act and Chess didn't hit any of the benchmarks. The words they use to describe cockatiels as a species didn't apply to Chess at all. I think he has some really deep seated problems.


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## tielfan (Aug 31, 2008)

> I think he has some really deep seated problems.


He might and he might not. Keep in mind that Chess has had his whole life turned upside down. First he moved to a new, unfamiliar environment and then he lost the companion that he was used to (Peak). Your intentions are good but you're asking him to do things that he isn't used to and he's not sure what to make of it. He's an adult, and adults are less adaptable than babies. Also, birds are prey animals so they tend to be very nervous in new situations. 

His behavior sounds fairly normal to me, but it's probably true that he doesn't have as much pet potential as a bird with a better past history. Plus some birds simply seem to be born with no interest in socializing with humans. One of Buster and Shodu's 20 children was like that so I got him a gig as a breeder. I don't know if Chess is like this or not but there really hasn't been enough time yet to find out.

Please don't get another bird unless you're committed to giving it a forever home. It isn't fair to the birds to buy a bird that you don't really want to satisfy another bird that you don't really want, with plans to trade both of them in on a bird that you think you'll like better. If you DO want another cockatiel, please buy it carefully. Instead of taking pot luck with whatever they have at the nearest pet shop, look for an appealing hand fed baby who demonstrates some tameness before you take it home. If possible, find a breeder with an aviary. Then, if you want to, you can offer to give them Chess if they'll commit to giving him a forever home. He may or may not be a successful breeder, but he has a good chance of being happy in an aviary full of cockatiels.

P.S. If you do get another bird it's best to have a separate cage for it, at least temporarily. Besides the quarantine issue, right now the cage is Chess's sanctuary. If a strange bird suddenly comes into it there's a good chance that he'll respond with aggression.


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## tielfan (Aug 31, 2008)

P.S. If Chess desperately wants the companionship of a mirror, then you can always put a mirror in the cage to make him happy. Mirrors are controversial but I think they're perfectly OK in many circumstances. I'm not actually convinced that it's a good answer in this situation, but if it calms him down it will at least give you some breathing space to decide on what to do next.

If you hang the mirror in a spot where it's easy to detach, then when you want him to come out of the cage you can take the mirror out and place it a short distance outside the cage door, and maybe he'll follow it. You can also hold the mirror in your hand to help with step-up training or general social time.


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## HAJiME (Sep 20, 2009)

I understand your annoyance because I have untame "rescued" birds. 



> vChess never leaves his cage now, but when Peak was here and Peak left the cage, Chess would often follow him out.


Sounds just like mine.

My first one wouldn't, and still won't if provided with a mirror, leave the mirror except to feed. So I just took it away and got a second tiel. The second tiel is the problem bird. He's larger, can be aggressive, flock calls for the other one when the other one _enjoys_ being away from him, bullys the other one. He's a dick! And he hisses, pecks and sways at me whenever I come anywhere near. But he follows the other one out of the cage.

My advice is put the tiel in the same room you spend most of your time and talk to them. Whilst I still can't touch my second tiel, he responds to me talking to him and is more happy to leave the cage and get on with his daily life when I'm nearby when he's been spending a lot of time in the same room as me.

I've had mine like 7 years or so and still progressing slowly. 2 months isn't very long.

And I think you're a fool if you think any other bird, besides a budgie, would be easier.


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