# Why does my male hiss at female?



## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Hi,

I recently joined the wonders of having cockatiels four days ago.  I bought these two cockatiels from an elderly woman who was too sick to care for them. To my suprise, two days later, apparently the one that I couldn't decide if it was male or female, had an egg. Well, anyway, the male (I think he is, he has the yellow face and talks alot) has been hissing at the female alot. She's always wanting to get closer to him and preen him and you know *snuggle*.  But he will then hiss and try and snap at her legs. I don't know what to do. She should be having another egg today and I'm happy, but I also want the pair to be happy too. If anyone has any suggestions or answers as to why the male does this pleas tell me!


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

There is a good chance that this is a 'bondage pair' and not a 'bonded pair' A bondage pair is 2 of the opposite sex kept together, but they had no choice in the matter, or never developed a bond to each other. When this happens the pair may mate and go to nest, due to hormones, but they tend not to be as diligent as to incubating the eggs and feeding the new hatchlings. Many time the hen may even start laying and if they haven't mated the eggs would be infertile.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

is there any way to help them? I mean, can I find away to make their bond stronger and less aggressive?


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

One other additional detail. The female follows the male around. It is the male that runs away or hisses. I read somewhere online that when a female is ready to mate she will try to follow the male around. Is this true? Do you think this could be a way of her trying to mate with him?


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Sorry, I forgot to say one other thing. I played the mating song of another male from youtube and my male began chirping very loudly and kept trying to break out the cage towards the computer and was getting kinda crazy. He is still chirping after 2 minutes of nothing....


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

And another thing. (Ishould probably think before I post) . While the male is making these LOUD chirping sounds, she is going back and forth on her perch and is making makes a different sound. I have no idea what just happened when I played that video. lol


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

_*is there any way to help them? I mean, can I find away to make their bond stronger and less aggressive?*_
*------------------------------------------------*
Think of it this way...how would you like it if your parents or whomever just grabbed a stranger off the street, locked you in a room with them and said that is who you are going to spend the rest of your life with? Sadly that happens to many birds. Hoping that they are going to change is unrealistic and during this time all it is doing is creating stress and the birds are miserable. if they do succomb and go to nest many times the babies become the victims of their frustrations. I have seen 'bondage pairs' rip the babies to peices as they hatched out...or just let them starve. Or if they sat on the eggs do birdy abortion by getting off the developing eggs and letting them chill and die.

Playing the YouTube videos is only going to increase the stress. You could risk serious injury to the hen if the male becomes too aggressive. On the ankle of the leg is a main artery. If that gets bit/cut the bird can blleed out, and if not caught soon enough die.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Wow....that's really gross....lol. ok. NO MORE YOUTUBE VIDEOS! hahaha. Thank you so much. I'll keep an even closer eye on them from now on. I also had another question. How do you know your female is about to have another egg. She was in the food bowl a few minutes ago making soft chirping sounds. Is this a sign of her giving birth again? Also, I have not been able to get any sleep due to the male bird hissing at the female so much. Do you have any suggestions as to calming the two of them down?


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

If her abdomen area looks a little swollen she might be due to lay an egg again. If she was in the feed bowl making soft cheeping noises she may have also been materbating.

You might consider separating the 2 into different cages. If either one is handtame work with them to be just pets.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

I'm curious, why would she do something like that? Also do you have any pictures that I could see to understand more about swollen abdomens in cockatiels?

Also, I thought it wasn't safe sometimes when you seperate cockatiels like that. I was wondering if they may start to become depressed. They have been together since they were just a few months old.

p.s
I think my best chance of teaching one to be a pet, would be the male. Although neither of them have ever been aloud out their cages with their previous owner, I think he would be the easiest to train due to his curiousity for me.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

I'm sorry to be asking so many questions. BUt where I live not many people breed cockatiels or no much about them. But, what does it mean when the feamle walks side to side on her perch? I've seen her do this alot lately. I've never seen the male do this. I'm sorry to sound so desperate, but I really don't want to seperate the two. I understand that they need to and I will if I must. But is there any way to help them without seperating them? The male doesn't really bite her, he just snaps at her to make her move away from him. Do you think I need a bigger cage for more privacy? I think its too small even for one bird. It came with the birds when I bought them. It says small to medium birds, but it looks small for 2 cockatiels.


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

OK...the most important thing is NOT to give a nestbox. It sounds like your female wants to breed and the male doesn't...so no sence in working up the hormones with anything like a box to encourgae it.

Yes...a larger cage would also work. This way they each have space to get away from each other.

Are they hand tamed? Many times the pacing back and forth is anxiety...and they may want some out time from the cage and handling.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

You're right it may be anxiety. I realized the only two times she does pace from side to side is when I come in or the male is singing some kind of long song. (he's doing one right now). 

I won't buy the nestbox, thank you for the warning....

Neither of them are hand-tamed, so I'll need to start from scratch with training them. This was one of my first goals, actually, before this hormone issue started up.


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

Even though neither one appears they are hand tamed...the chances are really high that they were handfed babies at one time. Almost 100% of the tiels out there were handfed. 

So it might take a little time. A friend of mine has 2 tiels someone gave her and she said they were not tame and would not even try to handle them. I reached into the cage and picked up one with one hand around the shoulders and the other under the abdomen and loosely held it to my chest. It squirmed a little and nibbled (did not bit hard) on my fingers and when it calmed down it was fine. She was surpised that it did not act like a vicous wild bird, and she did the same thing I did and the tiel was fine with her holding it.

Many people get discouraged for fear of being bit. They do not realize that tiels will use their beaks as another hand/foot for balance when being picked up. When the tiels beak touches the persons hand they jump back for fear of being bit. The tiel learns this and uses it to it's advantage in the future. If there is any biting a hand fed bird will only nibble on the fingers because they relate to the fingers as a source of food. If your tiels do this you can cut up some millet into smaller pieces and hold it in your hand when you go to work with the tiels....or to pick them up.

Just keep in mind...have patience and show no fear


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Thank you so much for your help! I would have made so many mistakes if it had not been for your help! I'll work with them and myself and try to overcome my fear of being bitten. Thank you again!


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Um, one last question...Is there any problems with my female being in the food bowl making the soft chirping sounds? (I don't want to say the word, hahaha) She started it up again today.


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

What I would do is keep an eye on her. What you do not want to see is a very large and swollen abdomen like in the pix.

The reason why she may be doing this is if the male is singing, and she is being stimulated by the sound. Separating them may help. it might take her awile to stop doing this when she hears him. If she becomes a future egg layer you other option may be to find a new male for her.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Thank you for the picture! Her abdomen hasn't been like that at all. She layed the second egg on monday at around 12 at night. Wow. It scared me when I heard that popping sound. hahaha. 

I think the major problem why he has been biting at her is because they are still getting used to their home. I talked to the previous owner and she said they never used to fight. It has only been a week since I brought them home. 

Recently, I've been snapping at him when he tries to bite or his at her and it has turned out pretty good. He is doing it less frequently and when he does hiss at her (which is once or twice) he looks at me to see if I'll get mad. So far I think it is working. I want to give them a little more time before I seperate them. There can be so many different reasons why he is hissing at her.

I was reading other forums and I am thinking of buying a couple more and a bigger cage. I think by increasing the amount, they can pair with whomever they want instead of who they were paired with.

(One other thing) The male has been singing alot more lately and right now I am noticing he goes closer to the female and sings right in her face. And she is also squawking back.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

I meant 12 in the morning


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

It sounds like your male is romancing or in love with the female. *Maybe he* might be able to whoo her and convince her he is not such a bad guy 

Where are her eggs? has she started sitting on them yet? The reason why I am asking is because if she starts sitting on them to incubate them 24/7 within 3-5 days you can candle them to see if they are fertile. If fertile they may have mated at some time, if not they haven't.

If she is warming up to him you might give it a week or two to see what goes on before separating them.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

The eggs are on the bottom of the cage right now. She hasn't started sitting on them yet. But, if I'm incorrect please tell me, some cockatiels wait until the third or so egg has been layed. She is due for the third one tonight.

I'm so exited and happy to see they are starting to get along.  I noticed the female has been turning her eggs though. She turns them once or twice a day and she (sometimes the male too) will go in the most private corner of the cage and just dig everything away. Is this some way of saying they need a place for their eggs?


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

That is great they are turning the eggs. They are going by instinct and until they are incubated they will turn them several times a day. So things sound good there.

OK...is the grate in the bottom of the cage? If not, that is good. You can place something shallow like a square box cut down to 4" in height and put some bedding in it. if you have a Petsmart close by try and get some aspen or pine shavings and fill the bottom of the box 1/2 way and make a slight indentationin the center to place the eggs.

Finger-crossed that all goes well 

NOTE: there is a possibility that the first couple of eggs may not be fertile if you haven't seen them mate. Hopefully they may mate and some of the eggs fertile.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

There is no grate. And I'll start making a box right away. Oh, and I had added shredded paper when I first discovered they were laying eggs. Is that good or bad? I cannot find a definite answer anywhere as to whether or not it is. I get alot of opinionated answers and no facts...

My fingers are crossed too!

Now I see why people enjoy having birds! They are way more exiting to breed and even to just take care of than fish! You see I breed freshwater fish including: angelfish, discus, mollies, swordtails, golden rams, and bettas. That was my first hobby, now I have moved onto birds! I am like falling in love with how cute and funny they are!


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

The shredded paper can later cause problems by being too slick for the chicks when they try to stand and contribute to leg problems. Also the parer is not going to hold heat well and once the pair starts incubating can contribute to early deaths in the eggs if fertile. When you get some aspen or pine bedding you can gradually add it to the paper and gradually remove most of the paper. 

I'm glad you are enjoying working with the birds. Tiels are great birds


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

I can get some aspen or pine tomorrow. I live across the street from a local pet store. Now that I know what paper can do, I will be sure to gradually remove them. Do you think that tonight once she lays her third egg, she may start to incubate them?


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

She may start to incubate on the 3rd or the 4th egg. Once you get the littletray/box ready they might start to incubate too.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Thanks, I'll inform you when if she starts to incubate them or if something has gone wrong. The male has seemed to found interest in them, but hasn't incubated them yet. But I hope he will start soon!


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

Thats great the male has an interest. Once they start incubating the male will sit during the day and the female at night. Sometimes both will share the nest and eggs.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Well, I think my female stopped laying her eggs. She was due for one last night, but nothing has come up. Last night though I noticed something interesting. When the male would hiss at the female because she was getting too close to him, she would hiss back. Before she would allow him to bite her, but now she gets mad when he does.


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

OK....this could be because when she was soliciting him he was refusing her. While he was trying to court her that triggerred the egg laying. If they hadn't mated she may know the eggs may not be fertile and her body told her to stop laying. I'm just thinking aloud....

Ok...today go ahead and make the nesting area. If you have a Sharpie marker mark the top (blunt end of egg) with a dot or date or whatever, and place them in the nest. The nest may stimulate them to mate, and if she does lay more eggs, which can take up to a week, you will know which eggs are the old and new ones.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Ok. So the weirdest thing just happened. My male tiel just randomly opened both of his wings and his tail feathers all the way and stretched out like that for about 10 seconds. Does he need some time to be out of his cage or is this some mating ritual?


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

Like the pix below? He may have been displaying himself, or if he did it while you were walking by or to the cage he was showing that it was his terratory or space


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Ok. I'll make sure I do everything today! I'm so excited to do this. You don't know how bored I have been this summer! When I got these two birds everything became so exciting again. hahaha


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Well, the female is sitting on her egg in the corner of the cage. For some reason she moved it away from the place I made her and ditched the other egg. She gets off of it when I am in the room, but gets back on it when I'm gone. I praying that this one my be fertile and I will at least have one baby!


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

I'm sorry I didn't see your reply srtiels. Yes, his wings were exactly like that! I'm in the room all of the time, so I don't think he was being territorial all of a sudden. Plus the female was on another bar next to him. So I think it is showing off.

It's strange, he wants to show off, but he doesn't want to mate.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Ok. So apparently the female was a whole day off schedule and had her egg just now. lol. I've got so much to learn! 

The male won't sit on the eggs, and the female goes on and off. She needs breaks at times and needs to eat or rest or something. But no one is there to sit on them. I'm starting to get nervous.

I'm moving the third abandoned egg over so she'll sit on it. Then I'll see what she will do...


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

Ok...when the hen is on the eggs are they *totally* under her, or can you see them just under her on either side of her? If you can still see them, she is sitting but hasn't started to seriously incubate yet.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

I just checked and yes she is completely on top of the eggs. 

The egg that she abandoned is back underneath her and she doesn't seem to mind. 

I can't wait to see if they are fertile or not!!!


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

That's great. Since they are first time parents they are still figuring things out. It'll be a few days before you'll know if the eggs are fertile. Take *visual* note of the color of the eggs now. If they remain this color for several days after incubation has begun they may not be fertile. If the shell color starts to look a dense solid white color then they are fertile.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

I didn't mention it earlier, but the first two eggs the female dropped from the highest perch. You don't know how dissapointed I was, but the third one she actually came down and layed it carefully in the corner of the cage. She seems to take care of that egg the most and I have no idea why. It's the cleanest, do you think that's why she likes it the most?


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

OK...were the first 2 eggs dented or cracked in any way? If so they will be no good....and she know it.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Yup, they were dented. She knows it, so do you think she knew the first two were probably infertile and wanted to save the fertile ones?


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

The denting would compromise the egg and be cause for bacteria to enter and to contribute to an early death if it was fertile. If she does lay another egg, remove the one with the dent.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

But wouldn't removing the dented eggs, compromise her health? Because then she would want to replace it, right?


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## srtiels (May 1, 2009)

It would take ALOT of eggs being layed to compromise her. If it looks like she kicks the egg out of the nest, just leave it out for a few days and then remove it.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Ok. thanks.


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## mpayjr (Aug 16, 2010)

Hey, so the eggs were infertile. I transferred them to the good couple who took care of them. But when I candled them I realized how they weren't fertile. So, I'm crossing my fingers my other pair will lay soon!


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